Monday, September 3, 2012

Happiest Childhood Memory - by Mom

           I think there are a number of kinds of “happy:”  Joyful happy, peaceful happy, excited happy. . .
            I have so many happy childhood memories, but  here were two that leapt to mind when I read your question, so we’ll do those. One is  of the joyful vairety; the other is delight.
            Both of these occurred when I was 3 to 5 years old, living in Buffalo, NY.
            My dad loved to take me for a walk on Franklin Street, which must not have been very far from our apartment on Elmwood Avenue.  I have just Googled for the maps of the main places from my memories of this time and found them all in a relatively small area of Buffalo. St. Joseph’s Cathedral, Canesius Jesuit School  on Delaware Street, the street we lived on (Elmwood Ave. ) and the street where my grandparents lived ( West Ferry Street. ) I know now from the map that we lived on Elmwood very close to Delaware because it was a very short walk to my kindergarten at Canesius School.  My world at age 3-5 was circumscribed by these four places.

ST. JOSEPH’S CATHEDRAL on Franklin Street.
 You can see on the map that  St. Joe’s was at the other end of  Elmwood Avenue from where our apartment was. So perhaps we drove to the church and just went for a walk in that vicinity.
            My Dad was in the Knights of Columbus in St Joseph’s parish, and also was the Scoutmaster of the Explorer Troop of the Parish.  When my mother broke her leg ice skating on Lake Erie, I was 5, and one of my Dad’s scouts Chuck  Alaimo was tasked with walking me to school in the morning. I don’t have any recollection of how I got home.  Perhaps one of my aunts picked me up and took me back home.  Chuck lived nearby and it was on his way to school, so he held my hand the two or three blocks and took me to the school in the snow and ice.  (Buffalo has the most snowfall of all American cities, if you didn’t know.)What a good Scout!
            But that’s not the happy memory I was going to tell you.
            My Dad was really attached to the Cathedral parish.   He loved the building, the grounds, the nuns and priests. I was supposed to go to kindergarten there, and I don’t know why that fell through, perhaps because of the distance from our house. Anyway, my intended kindergarten teacher was Sister Aurelia.  I recall she was young and pretty, and the day Dad told her I wouldn’t be coming to her class, she went into the convent and brought out the three figures – Jesus, Mary and Joseph—that we have used all these years in our main nativity set.  They were wrapped in a hankie or a scarf, and she seemed so sad.  
            But that’s not the memory I was going to tell.  This is it.
            One day in the spring my Dad and I were walking down Franklin Street in front of the cathedral and we met a man in a wheelchair coming the other way.   We stopped and talked, and I saw that the man didn’t have any legs below the knee.  I started to cry and they asked my why and I said it was because his legs were gone. The man smiled really sweetly and reached in his pocket and gave me some coins.  My Dad kind of didn’t want to take them, but the man insisted that he wanted to give me something, that it wasn’t for Dad, it was for me.
            I remember noticing that my dad’s feelings were stirred by this encounter, but I didn’t understand it.  Now, I can surmise that the man was a veteran of WWII which had ended only a few years before, during which Dad had lost buddies but himself had been spared grave physical injury. Perhaps he felt, ‘There but for the grace of God go I.”  Anyway, we went into the cathedral and used the coins to light a candle for the man with no legs, and knelt and said a prayer to Mary for him.
  I can’t imagine it was my idea to do that.  My Uncle Johnny had a candy and ice cream store and I’m pretty sure I would have thought of getting an ice cream before I would have thought of lighting the candle.  But my dad made me think that I was the one who was pious and generous, and I felt quite happy that I was such a good girl. I think now it was a defining moment, literally, in that in whatever way a 5 year old can have a sense of self, I had the sense that I was sympathetic, prayerful and unselfish. More than likely, it was how my dad wanted me to be, or to become. I just know that it made me feel really happy.  I call this kind of happy “Joy.”
The second happy memory involved a toy truck. I have found a picture of it and would really like  to paste it here, but I can’t figure out how to do it..  It was a Tonka truck 1954  with a green cab and white cargo area.  It was heavy, to my hands at least, molded metal with hard black rubber wheels, and a chain across the open back. The white sides of the cargo area were like slats.  On Google the captions call it a utility truck.  Anyway, our apartment was on the second floor, above the dental office of our landlord, Dr. Patti (sp?) who lived in the 3rd floor apartment above us with his wife and children.
Our apartment was spacious to my eyes. It had a front entrance and a back entrance, both up a flight of stairs. The back door entered directly from the outside, but the front door entered from an indoor staircase.  From the front door, the kitchen was directly ahead and the bathroom to the left at the end of a hallway.  To the right the hall went to the living room and two bedrooms.  The hardwood floor of the hallway ran from outside the bathroom all the way to the back door, an extremely long distance to me at the time.
I don’t know why we got the truck, but the day we got it, Daddy started playing with me with it, rolling it to me across the floor. I loved the feel of it, the sound of the rubber wheels rolling on the wood, and especially that power of pushing it and watching it go such a distance! Little by little, I learned to line it up and push it straight so that it would go farther and farther without bumping either wall, and get all the way to Daddy on one push.  Gradually, he backed up farther and farther down the hall towards the bathroom end. That was the dark end, while I sat in the living room end, which was full of light from the windows on that side.  Mom stood in the kitchen doorway, watching intently as we sent that truck speeding between us, back and forth. From my push it would go clear into the dark  where my Dad’s big hands would catch it, turn it around and whizzz it back to me.  It had a hefty feel as I turned it back around for the return trip.  I loved the solid weight of that truck.
 We were all laughing at the sheer fun of simple play.  I clapped my hands every time I sent it down the hall, and every time if came back to me. Over and over I sent that truck into the dark and only to have it return again and again and again from my father’s hands, into mine, my mother leaning in the doorframe, cool and graceful in her yellow and brown skirt, cheering us on.
Our play seemed to last for hours, but in fact, it has lasted 56 years in my heart and mind  as a moment of pure happiness, the kind I would call “delight.”

No comments:

Post a Comment